Anyone who has grown up with a traditional education knows perfectly well how this threat ends: a warning that frightened even the most mischievous children, a warning, an affirmation of parental power.
Today, however, children, when called to answer, end sentences in a completely different way. On TikTok, the "Complete the Challenge phrase" has gone viral, a fashion that consists of creating videos in which parents question their children about those famous authoritarian phrases of the past.
The opinion of the pedagogist Daniele Novara
We asked the pedagogist Daniele Novara for an opinion to analyze the effects of this new form of communication.
"Those traditional phrases of the past were somehow toxic phrases," Novara explained to us. "We could call it patriarchy in its purest form. The family once made cruelty its code. We are talking about at least two generations ago, however. We have left it behind".
According to Novara, however, this paradigm reversal in parental communication can hide an opposite risk: that of transforming the parent into a figure on an equal footing with the child, almost therapeutic. "Parents have an educational role, they cannot be the therapists of their children, they cannot catch up, I don't understand the goal. Children must play, not have pedagogical dialogues with their mother".
The pedagogist, in this sense, underlined the importance for children of educational experiences related to movement and sociality: "The games with which they should entertain themselves are others, not social ones, but sports ones, for example".
Gentle Education: Loss of Authority?
The social challenge is part of a strand of types of online videos that tend to raise awareness of gentle education: a model based on respect and empathy that is becoming increasingly central in modern families and increasingly viral on other social networks as well. This is demonstrated by the naïve responses of children, who reinterpret traditional phrases spontaneously:
The social challenge is part of a strand of types of online videos that tend to raise awareness of gentle education: a model based on respect and empathy that is becoming increasingly central in modern families and increasingly viral on other social networks as well. This is demonstrated by the naïve responses of children, who reinterpret traditional phrases spontaneously:
- "This house is not a hotel" becomes "This house is not... ugly".
- "Good children don't cry" becomes "Good children... they don't raise their hands".
- "As long as you live in this house do as I say" turns into "As long as you live in this house... you won't want another one."
"We don't ask ourselves if the originality of the production of a social video really corresponds to the educational needs of one's children," Novara argued. "These excesses of speech to children are a new form of manipulation. They prevent children from making their own lives and their growing experiences, from making mistakes and understanding the mistake on their own".
According to the pedagogist, a child has the right to experience his emotions spontaneously, without being forced to have a kind attitude at all costs: "Childhood emotions are wild and must remain so. A child runs, spits, jumps, climbs a tree. It is closer to the primary components of existence. The mother must let her child grow up as it comes naturally to him and not induce him into programmed behaviors".
According to the pedagogist, a child has the right to experience his emotions spontaneously, without being forced to have a kind attitude at all costs: "Childhood emotions are wild and must remain so. A child runs, spits, jumps, climbs a tree. It is closer to the primary components of existence. The mother must let her child grow up as it comes naturally to him and not induce him into programmed behaviors".
From education to social virality
The Complete Challenge sentence is not just a game between parents and children: it is part of a digital culture where the most intimate moments become publicly shared content.
The naivety of the little ones is fascinating, but their participation in digital fashions raises ethical questions. While the new family communication based on kindness strengthens the bond between parents and children, its transformation into viral content on social media risks distorting its authenticity. When education becomes a digital spectacle, is the boundary between spontaneity and media construction lost?
"In some way, yes. It is not necessary to tell on social media how to educate your child," warns Novara. "I don't understand the goal. Media exposure is prohibited. It is not a criminal offense, but prohibition belongs to models of civilization. To parents, moreover, I want to say one thing: be careful about publishing photos and videos of your children because the world of pedophilia is ready to use these images. The world of child pornography is being fed. Children have the right to be seen by their loved ones and not by the whole world"
And he concludes: "The parent must set a good example. Words are useful up to a certain point."The "Complete the Challenge Sentence" undoubtedly has the merit of having stimulated a reflection on new educational models, showing that love and kindness can be the pillars of a healthy family relationship. But at what cost?
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